(Note to Hubs: Yes, I know exactly when I've crossed the line into irrationality, but I never can seem to find a graceful exit from the insanity that follows. Besides, do you know how annoying it is to be told I'm being ridiculous when I already know I'm being ridiculous? Just let the moment pass and I will slink away on my own accord.)
Anyway.
We aren't celebrating until tomorrow night, when our friend Amy has graciously volunteered (read: been duped into) babysitting for us.
Still, my deluded spouse somehow thought there might be anniversary-related marital relations last night when he slid into bed seductively and rested a hand on my thigh.
"I have cramps," I said, not bothering to look up from my book.
"I know what will make them better."
I put the book down.
"Why do men always think that sex is the cure for any ailment? If a stray softball hit you in a vulnerable area during a game, how would you react if I sidled up and whispered, "I know what will make that better."
He grinned.
"OK," I said. "Scratch that. Clearly, you would take me up on that offer, which shows how pitifully eager men are."
He moved closer.
I held up a hand.
"Scoot right back over to your side, buster. It's not happening tonight. When my ibuprofen kicks in, I am turning out this light and we are going to sleep. Correction — you are going to sleep. I, on the other hand, will lie here listening to you snore, wondering how long you will live after I apply duct tape to your nostrils."
He sighed.
"Happy anniversary!" I sang.
So — no sweet, loving tribute to my suffering spouse today. Perhaps tomorrow, after our evening out, when the PMS has vanished.
Tomorrow, perhaps, I'll regale you with the story of how we hooked up. It involves humiliation (mine) and cheating (mine).
Meanwhile, here are a few photos of the happy couple during non-pre-menstrual times.
18 comments:
AWWWWWW! So romantical!
Yeah, I'm pretty sure after the first five years it's all downhill...
(Did I say that out loud? DAMMIT!)
Can't wait to hear about the hook-up.
Happy Anniversary!
I think I've had similar conversations with my hubby...
Oh I've had that same conversation. Both about my irrationality and the cramps.
Hope the stars align for your big night out.
You guys are adorable
I'm having a very difficult time reconciling that conversation with the gorgeous couple in those pictures.
Happy Anniversary!
Heidi
Happy anniversary!
(and awww, poor guy! :))
Your poor husband! But after seven years, he should know better!
Happy Anniversary!
ha ha ha ha - I know those moments when the irrational is obvious even to those in the throes!
Nice of him to offer to "fix" it for you. It actually cured PMS and a headache recently... (well, not your hubby, obviously :) ) - but the trick is for them to wait until service is required.
Happy Anniversary!
Aren't men dopey? The other night my DH tried to convince me that "the deed" would make my pregnancy-induced heartburn better. Yeah, right.
Such a lovely couple!
And yeah...why do men think that? :)
Happy Anniversary!
The difference between men and women is that they honestly believe that sex will cure what ails ya.
Lovely photos.
ROFLMAO...been there done that (this past weekend woot)
lol. Great post.
A similar situation went down in my boudoir last night. Apparently, in my house, it's not only a cure-all but also reward for doing things like putting down the toilet seat.
I read some more of your blog and I loved it so much I think I shall add you to my blogroll!!
Oh, how I can relate to this!
Happy Anniversary to the gorgeous couple!
You know, ain't nothin' better than love, ugly as moments can be. Here's to pulling through the crampy brattiness.
I couldn't have wrote this post better myself.
Snicker.
Here's to a happy anniversary and your husband finally getting some.
What great photos. You two are adorable.
What is it with men. I can look like crap, have the flu and be coughing up my lungs and my hubs would still try and put the moves on me.
I appreciate the love and dedicaon but man,,,, please.
You, my friend, are absolutely hilarious! I just think you are the greatest - PMS and all! LOVE the pics!
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